I found this floating over on Tumblr @ faroverthemistymountains, and honestly, these never actually pan out on Tumblr, the ask tags, and though I thought about just screaming all my answers in the tags, I would have eventually run out of room, so here we are!

The rest of this celebratory month’s Wednesday posts will feature book reviews, but I needed a hot minute to start reading, especially because my reviews for anything Tolkien are insane, so we’re kicking things off with a fun, short little tag!

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Middle Earth:
The Hobbit or Lord of the Rings

This is always going to be an easy answer for me. I grew up with LOTR, and I honestly didn’t read The Hobbit until long after I’d already read all three and seen the movies. LOTR was what made me fall in love with fantasy, too. It was the first time I ever read something that epic and thought oh maybe I could write that, too.

Fellowship:
Favorite Hobbit movie

OH THIS IS HARD. A lot of them have flaws, and though reading The Silmarillion has shown me that a lot of those “flaws” are just pieces of other texts brought in, I’m still aggravated by this entire trilogy that should have been, at most, a duology, and definitely should not have included a love triangle, but if I have to choose one, it’s the first one. We get to meet all the dwarves, Bilbo isn’t totally obnoxious yet, and Thorin has a lot of kingly moments.

The One Ring:
Favorite LOTR movie/book

TWO TOWERS! FOREVER! This is such an easy one because a) Helm’s Deep b) Ents c) Aragorn/Legolas/Gimli running. There’s so much to love about Two Towers, though I’m definitely basing this on the movie and get back to me in, like, a few months when I’ve reread the trilogy because it might change.

Bilbo Baggins:
Favorite character

Oh, SAM! Okay, honestly, I literally just wrote an entire post on why he’s my favorite, plus he’s number one on my Top 10 favorite characters, so I’m just linking both of those for your enjoyment.

Dor Guldur:
Least favorite character

HA, bet you thought I was gonna say Gollum, but nah, it’s Grima Wormtongue, he is literally the worst. Not only does he brainwash one of my favorite characters, but then he goes sniveling back to Saruman, grovels at his feet, and then stabs him in the back. Grima sucks.

Gundabad:
Favorite “evil” character

Look, don’t look at me like that, it’s Melkor/Morgoth, and we all knew this was coming, and if you didn’t, well, stay tuned for the end of the month where I convince you. He’s the best, okay, and he’s such a drama queen, and I cannot with that mangodchild.

The Shire:
Favorite place

ROHAN! Forth Eorlingas! I have the map of Rohan tattooed on my thigh because I love it that much, and someday I’m definitely going to get the horse on the flag next to it. There’s just no one cooler than the Rohirrim, and anytime I’m near any kind of flat, rolling plains, I start shouting Théoden speeches.

Rivendell:
Favorite species

Oh, Men, for sure. I think I’ve already mentioned it somewhere (or I’m losing my mind, totally possible), but I’ve got a post coming up on why they’re my favorite race, so keep an eye out for that. But the tl;dr of it is that they’re stubborn and flawed and so annoying sometimes, but they try so hard, and they’re so full of hope, and ugh their KINGS.

Misty Mountains:
Do you have a favorite quote from the movies/books?

I’ve definitely dropped this gif in at least seven posts in recent memory. And I’ve 100% quoted it in my yoga class twice as many times. This quote inspires me endlessly. I think of it during all times of my life, and it’s often what picks me back up again.

Mirkwood:
Would you rather be an elf, hobbit, mankind, dwarf, wizard?

A hobbit. I’d like to live in a nice little hole in the ground, spend my days tending to my garden and drinking tea, and my nights reading books by the firelight. It sounds like such a delightful, quiet little life.

Gondolin:
Favorite Durin’s son

Broooooo, are you allowed to ask that?! We all know what my answer is, but I feel so bad! They all die, this isn’t fair! It’s totally Thorin!

The Nine:
Favorite fellowship member

Okay, look, it’s Sam, but because I’ve already chosen him for one of these, we’ll go with Frodo, who also happens to just be my second favorite character, whatever. Frodo is such a pure little soul, and he makes my heart break constantly. He doesn’t deserve the pain he’s given, but he carries it with a stout heart, and UGH WHY.

Sindarin:
Favorite weapon

Duh, Aragorn’s. From the very first time we see the shards of Narsil, I had this feeling of ohhhhhhh BOY. I love a metaphorical sword so much, and Aragorn accepting the newly forged Andúril is A+++++++ story writing to tell us he’s finally reading to take on the mantle of king. Plus, that thing is so goddamn tall, it’s amazing.

Minas Tirith:
Do you own any LOTR/Hobbit merch?

Actually, not a lot! I have a Funko pop of Sam & Frodo, but that’s it. I’d like more of the Fellowship, and I once had a shirt with all 13 dwarves on it, but I don’t have any other material merch. What I do have is a tattoo of the map of Rohan and the white tree flag of Gondor, though, and I’ve got a whole mural idea for more.

Gig-Galad:
Would you have changed something from the movie?

There are a lot of things I would have changed about The Hobbit. I loved Tauriel, but not only was her love triangle stupid, they tricked Evangeline Lilly into filming it after they said they wouldn’t, and that’s effing rude. On the other hand, I’m really glad they didn’t include Tom Bombadil in Fellowship because I probably would have revolted. However, what really takes the cake is how they changed the death of Thorin, Fili, and Kili. It’s badass in the book, and they made it lame. How do you make the most painful and epic death lame in the world? I honestly don’t know, but they did it.

Minas Morgul:
Gandalf or Saruman?

Gandalf, duh. Saruman was kind of a whatever villain for me. Yeah, he’s basically Mairon before he becomes Sauron, but Sauron’s so wrapped up in his own bullshit that he can’t be a mentor to Saruman like Melkor/Morgoth was to him. And Saruman tries so hard to be a cooler villain than Sauron, which he never will be, so it’s YAWN. And yes, I get that Saruman is supposed to be the real physical villain that we can actually fight, but he was just so meh while Gandalf was such a badass that it’s an easy decision.